>When I got engaged, the actual wedding was so far off that it was not a reality. For 12 months I have been really cool, calm and, to some, seemingly disinterested in talking about my wedding every minute of the day (like I should). Last weekend something happened that sent me into a spin and made me realise I needed to get my sizable arse into gear (I did have 12 months to reduce the caboose… somehow I just kept thinking I had ages before I had to get into exercise and stop eating crap) and organise all the stuff I did I would a bit closer to the wedding.
That something was MY HEN’S NIGHT!!!
First thing that comes to mind is male strippers in leppard print g-bangers coverd in oil flexing and gyrating to Rikki Martin’s “She bangs”. Don’t ask me where that comes from. I am still shuddering at my misfortune to turn the TV on a few weeks ago to see Jamie Drury footage when he was in Manpower. I prefer Backyard Blitz Jamie. He is so less offensive when dressed in Kahki, wearing blunnies and wielding a shovel. Second thing that comes to mind is penis drinking straws (thanks Lil), and of walking around town wearing a veil covered in condoms.
Thankfully my darling bridesmaids have more taste than that. We had High Tea at the Windsor (very proper and posh) followed by jugs of cocktails at Madame Brussels (somewhat less proper, but a large cut above male strip clubs).
Somehow, I did drink a lot but at the end of the night I wasn’t drunk, just bloody tired. Guess I am getting old (and my liver has finally turned in to a rock).
Did I mention it is 2 weeks til my wedding and I still haven’t seen or tried on my magical one-off dress???? Got to make it exciting for my mother somehow……